Song of the day: Mapei – Don’t Wait

The typical expression of opening Friendship would be something like, “What? You too? I thought I was the only one.”
… It is when two such persons discover one another, when, whether with immense difficulties and semi-articulate fumblings or with what would seem to us amazing and elliptical speed, they share their vision – it is then that Friendship is born. And instantly they stand together in an immense solitude.

~ C.S. Lewis

Naturally, one of the apprehensions with moving to a new place is leaving friends. Will i make new ones? How long will it take? Will they get me like my current friends do? What if i lose touch with my current friends?

One thing that traveling and moving teaches you is there’s no need to worry. Amazing people you connect with exist everywhere. We each of us live in a house with lots of rooms: Some are core to our livelihood and we use them daily, some we know exist but never open, and others we don’t even know exist.  Until you realize that someone else has an identical room to yours and an instant bond is formed. Or maybe they were in the same room all along and just invisible to each other. Anyway, you get comfortable with someone in one room and more often than not, you open up the rest of the house.

That’s the definition of friendship I’m going with.  Its also why I believe that friends are the true soul mates.

I’ve been really lucky in my friendships when I’ve moved and traveled. Partly because seeking out connections and similarities is one of my life goals, and a lot because I’ve been blessed to live and work in great, open communities. Some of the keys [that I know about] that have unlocked my friendships have looked like this:

Being raised in different cultures. Enjoying Korean dramas. Being an African in America.

Being a woman in a technical role. Jane Austen. Traveling solo and not speaking the native language.

Roger Federer. A debate on death and the afterlife. Sherlock. 

I have friends who are me from another mother and others so different we may have come from different planets. I’ve had connections last 20 years (and counting) and others last 8 hours.  Some of the shortest ones have changed my life. Many of the longer ones have saved it. Every single one has enriched it. Every one has taught me something and played a part in shaping who I am.

To end this post that got too long, I’ll just say this: I consider many people my friends. But there’s a special place in my heart for those who “get” me. You know who you are. You whose existence makes me smile. Who love me for my weirdness, side eyes and all. Who laugh with me and listen to me and encourage my dreams when they’re just a random thought. Who support me through changes  of location and interests and mentality. I’m thankful for you and I love you. Incredibly so.

And for my just blossoming friendships – I’m incredibly thankful for you as well. For the laughter and camaraderie and openness and even the awkward silences. Because of you this transition is fun and interesting and much less lonely and I’m excited for the coming times.

No post on friendship is complete without J and Cece  (Awkward Black Girl)

No post on friendship is complete without J and Cece (Awkward Black Girl)

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